How to Stop Settling | You Deserve More

3 Keys to the Better Life You Deserve


You deserve more.  I’m gonna put it bluntly, because it’s true.

You work hard, you do your self-work, you make a point of helping others.

Believe it or not, you are worthy of great things.

But a lot of the time, because of the challenges, or our conditioning, we refuse to believe it.

It’s time to take a closer look. Be honest with yourself. This is a lot farther than you were, but it’s not what you were dreaming of. There’s pieces missing that you’ve been hesitant to believe are possible to change for you.

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Where are you settling in life?

Do you feel loved and appreciated by the people you’ve chosen to surround yourself with?

Is your home beautiful and organized, and full of loving energy?

Are you pursuing your passion daily and seeing the rewards?

Are you feeling connection with your spirit and a clear sense of direction more often than not?

Do you have enough fun, and free time?

Do you have as much money as you’d like to?

Do you feel good about yourself, the way you move through the world, and your accomplishments?

Are you relaxed, energized, and healthy?

Are you expanding your mind, your skills, and getting creative?

 

If any of these questions gave you a shrinking feeling or made you laugh as if it were silly to expect that to happen for you… girl, you’re settling for less than you deserve.

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There are three main components that come into play.

 

 

Worthiness

First and foremost, you’re not going to take any actions to give yourself what you deserve if you don’t believe you’re worth the effort, or can let yourself accept your prizes with open appreciation.

You’ve got to remember that nobody in the world has been, or ever will be, perfect. Our “perfection” lies in our divine essence, our unique qualities, and our ability to grow and change. The most powerful transformation comes from our ability to let go of the past and move forward, and our ability to see the beauty in the hidden places in life, including in the parts of ourselves we’ve been rejecting for years.

What is it that makes you feel unworthy?

Usually it stems from ways that someone else has judged us in the past, or a way that we tend to judge the world around us.

Do you feel like you’re not worthy of unconditional love because you’ve made this mistake or that mistake and never forgiven yourself? Or maybe because of the ridiculous beauty standards shoved down our throats since childhood making us questiong our inherent lovability?

Do you feel crappy about where you’re at in life because someone (maybe even yourself) told you it wasn’t good enough for the age you are right now? Instead of encouraging you to appreciate your accomplishments and reminding you that you’re capable of anything, and helping you come up with a game plant to get to where you really want to be?

Do you just not prioritize your own worth because you’re so busy taking care of everyone else, that you’re too afraid to admit how badly you need to rest and do things for you, because if you stopped, everything would fall apart? And then you’d feel super guilty about it?

Firstly, whether your lack of prioritizing your worth is one of these, or something unique to you, you are NOT alone.

We all have some level of challenge when it comes to believing we can do this or that it’s even acceptable for use, because we’re not used to thinking we deserve it.

Our subconscious minds are filled with judgements from the people we were surrounded by when we were growing up, and these things tend to stick with us, hidden in the depths, secretly influencing what we believe about our abilities and our worth.

If you imagine yourself with a million dollars that you just earned from doing something really easy and aligned with your purpose, engaged to some otherworldly-level-of-gorgeous person who’s also super intelligent… walking into to your family’s holiday dinner, or a room full of people you went to high school with, I bet all kinds of uncomfortable scenarios start to form in your head.

This guy will be judging you out of jealousy, someone else will be judging you because they think you’re probably some kind of a fake, because they believe rich people are all just selfish jerks and con-artists. Someone else will be judging that there’s no way the relationship will last, coming up with every reason they can make up on the spot, because they feel insecure about not having attracted someone so impressive in their own life.

Our own inner judgements and insecurities about ourselves talk the same way when we start to think about the things we really want in life. And since we’ve got to believe we deserve these wonderful things in order to pursue them without giving up, it’s our job to figure out which ones we’re struggling with, and see the truth behind the judgement or lie. And the truth is always that we’re good enough, we’re lovable, we’re worthy, and we’re free to change our situation.

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Boundaries

So, once we’ve got the ide of which limiting belief we’re here to reprogram so that we can stop settling and start improving our lives, the next step is to draw a very clear line between what is acceptable and what is not.

Now, depending on what it is that you’re changing, it can look like a few different things, but it’s always going to include saying “yes” to what you’re worthy of and saying “no” to settling.
Wear the nice outfit in the back of your closet that you worry about getting dirty, so that you can feel gorgeous and abundant and magnificent.

Say no to the offer that is going to stress you out and make you feel like you’re contradicting what’s right for you.

Say YES to the opportunities that scare you, that feel risky and just beyond your reach.

Say HELL YES to the big move you’re not sure is safe to take.

Be smart, be practical, absolutely, but start DOING it!
In relationships, friendships, and partnerships, if you’re being disrespected, give an ultimatum, with a timeframe. If it’s not met, you deserve better, and you should leave. Or if it’s a really strong disrespect, just leave, girl.

If you feel stuck in a job that’s not what you actually care about and you’re miserable there, refuse to let yourself stay there any longer than you have to. Start looking for, or creating a better career for yourself, and truly dedicate yourself to it.

What you do for a living is what you spend the most hours of your life on. If you want to spend most of the hours of your life doing something more meaningful, than take it absolutely seriously, because it’s one of the most important changes you’ll ever make. Invest your time, your money, your energy, and your soul into making it real. What is it that you’d do in the world, that helps make it a better place every day, if you didn’t have to worry about money? That will give you a first glimpse into what will make you happier.

There’s no reason to be scared. There are always going to be more people, and more opportunities that are healthier for you, and more fulfilling, but you have to make room in your life for them.

Setting clear boundaries doesn’t just tell you, and also your subconscious mind, what you’re done with. It also tells the Universe. When you make it clear through your words and your actions that you are done with something in your life, whether it’s disrespect, being under-appreciated, or overworked, the Universe takes a note of that, and starts to close the doors to those energies, and open their opposites for you to stride proudly into.


Discipline (Dedication)

Ahhhh, discipline. That old friend lurking in the corner ready to smack you with a ruler if you get out of line. No, I’m just kidding. Don’t get discouraged, I’ve got something up my sleeve for ya.

That old method of crackin’ the whip may work for some people, but for me, it’s easier to work with myself, and use encouragement and goals to keep me sticking to my plan.

Discipline is one of those things in life that’s like a muscle. Even if you’ve always sucked with self-discipline (and I say this from experience, so trust me here) by taking baby-steps and working WITH yourself, you can see improvements faster than you’d expect to.

I used to be WILDLY undisciplined. Really, though. I’ve always been a wild-child, free-spirit, ethereal creature, and gypsy soul at heart. I would regularly tell time and space to suck it (and still do) but I hadn’t realized, until hitting age 29 and realizing I’d been putting off all the work I didn’t “feel like” doing towards my lofty business aspirations for literally a decade

During the majority of my 20s, although it was an absolutely beautiful journey full of potent transformation, I was caught up in a common pitfall of “law of attraction & lightworker types”… which is to accidentally get ungrounded, by following the “path of least resistance” and high vibrations and ease, instead of feeling into the path of your true calling, and grounding your soul fully, strengthening through the challenges that it comes with.

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It was then that I saw just how much I was holding myself back by not fully embracing my inner authority over my own life. I’ll be honest, it’s been very challenging for me, because I’d never done it before! But, regardless of that, I’ve made amazing progress, and it’s all thanks to redefining discipline as dedication, and taking baby steps to make things easy to integrate a little bit at a time.

I find that this works with my clients too. Every week we’ll have one main action step to take, to move them closer to their goal. It’s the one action that reminds them how dedicated they are to their path, their purpose, their improvement, and grounds it into the rhythm of their life right now, as a new steady beat coming from the heart of their soul. And because it was just one task (two if they’re really on fire) it’s manageable.

It’s still challenging, because it’s something new, it’s something important, and, since it came up in a coaching session, it’s something they’re struggling with. But, they’ve also got backup, through being reminded of WHY they’re doing this. When they feel stuck or frustrated, they’ll send me a message for that extra boost, that reminder that they decided they’re done settling for less than they deserve, and help them push through it. But we all also have the ability to be our own reminder.

The mantra that came to me this week is very simple and is working really well for me.

Just finish the sentence with what’s relevant to what you’re committed to doing in the moment.

 

“I deserve to be a disciplined woman who…”

When you’re not feeling strong in a confrontation, tell yourself:
“I deserve to be a disciplined woman who …says no to disrespect.”

Deciding what to wear to get out of couch-potato mode and feel fancy (hahaha!):
“I deserve to be a disciplined woman who …is beautiful and well groomed and decorated.”

Struggling to get yourself to work out, or choose healthy foods:
“I deserve to be a disciplined woman who …has a healthy body.”

Struggling to get yourself to do the tasks needed to create a business out of your passion:
“I deserve to be a disciplined woman who …runs a successful business that helps people.”

Struggling to let yourself take a break when you desperately need one:
“I deserve to be a disciplined woman who… values herself and her well-being.”


These three keys, when put together, will help you to stop settling, and let yourself have the wonderful life you truly deserve.

You’re a good person, you’ve got a massive heart, and I’m looking forward to seeing you dedicating yourself to being truly fulfilled and nourished, because I’ve got a feeling it’s a long time comin’.


 

What are you feeling, as you’ve been reading this, that you’re opening up to letting yourself believe you deserve, and dedicating yourself to making happen?

Looking to dig a little deeper, and have real, grounded support to help get you through?  

Learn more about the coaching and energy work that I offer


to assist you through this journey of grounding your soul,


so that you can feel more fulfillment, satisfaction, and freedom

every single day.

yoursouliscalling

BE BOLD | Faerie Oracle Reading | Week of Sept 8th | Aquarian Goddess

Hey, everyone!

This week, the energies will require us to tune into our inner truth and act boldly.

Check out the video to see what the fae have to say, and some advice on the best ways to apply their insights!

 

Struggling with something you need clarity on, to move forward in your own life?

To schedule a personal reading on any topic, you can message me here.
I’d be happy to work with you!

Standard Pricing:
$62 for 26 minutes

First Time Client Special Introductory Offer:
$26 for 26 minutes

Intuitive Healing/Reading Sessions

“Working with Jen has been massively transformative on so many levels. I’ve done two reiki sessions with her and she’s connected with such an open heart and eager ears. It’s been utterly lighthearted and fun as well as equally deep and very healing! It was a gentle experience where I felt seen, heard, loved and guided.

My first reiki session she explained the root of my core blocks, hidden karma and energetic imbalances that I hadn’t been aware of. The session itself was a beautiful meditative state where I felt my body become lighter and powerful physical shifts. She spent some time detailing everything that she had seen and I was amazed by how gifted and connected she is. It had given me answers to a lot of emotions I couldn’t identify as well as physical imbalances. I felt centered and empowered, like I dropped heavy baggage and was steered in the direction of my path.

I was reminded who I was and shown how guided I am, always. Before the second session I was having a lot of digestive issues and feeling so emotionally heavy. She worked through this with me and had shifted the energy entirely. She dives into your whole being physically, emotionally, energetically and really clears out any blocks while also giving the most heart-centered advice. She is such a beautiful soul with a powerful healing ability and the absolute sweetest and uplifting personality (which really, is a healing in itself). Her wisdom is expansive and her intentions are so pure and endearing, I am so blessed to have connected this way! Her work has weaved through my healing journey in the most impactful way.

I still drop into the advice and the messages that have come from the sessions and find the healing continue to trickle into everyday. Through my work with shamans, counselors as well as other reiki healers no one has been able to drop in like she has. Until next time! Much love !” 

– Carolyn Valentine, Mansfield MA 

Life, we often don’t notice, is really much more than it seems to be.  The world is a series of woven energy patterns and infinite possibilites that we move through.

In the work that I do with my clients, I combine my years of Reiki practice (Third Degree Reiki Master since 2010) with intuitive energy-work, the earthy pagan vibes that come naturally to me, the assistance of my (and your) guides and guardians, sound, movement, and intention to facilitate transformation in your field and align you to your core individual Truth.

This is always with the foundational intention of activating your unique divine blueprint… activating the potential of you being who you were divinely designed to be, walking your most fulfilling path, in the highest possible frequency reality of harmony for all of life that can be grounded here and now.

It can reach you wherever you are, and will give you what you need.

Which, sometimes, what we need isn’t the same as what we want.  Blockages will be realeased and can cause changes in our habits, patterns, and foundations.  So, be prepared for deep insights, facing harsh truths that profoundly free you, and more magical and synchronistic experiences in your everyday life.

Sessions can be conducted by video chat or phone.  For each session, we’ll set aside an hour and a half, so that there is time to perform the energy work, and then discuss the insights that were gathered, and touch briefly on how to best apply them to your life.

Insights can include any variety of information that your higher self and spiritual guides wish to impart to you during the session.  This information can range from starseed lineage information to animal totem presences, suggested herbs or crystals, and most commonly, plenty of detail about activities occuring around specific chakras or areas of the body, what is clearing, and often insight into the emotions, memories, or situations that play a part in the healing of that part of your field.

Booking Your Session

Inspired by a naturopath I used to see during difficult times, I offer a “pay it forward” system for my pricing.

Personally, I’ve always made it a priority to be patient, save up, and pay full price for energy work…

Because the more of your own dedication and personal energy that you put into something, the more deeply it grounds into your field, and the more present and dedicated to the experience you will be, amplifying your results.

However, we sometimes need something that is just beyond our reach…

And in a time when I really needed healing, a wondederful doctor offered this payment method and I was able to receive healing that I desperately needed, because other kind souls who were able to give a bit more, made this possible through their generous contributions and appreciation of this heartfelt approach.

The pricing options are as follows:

For those who truly need it now.
$126

Normal pricing.
$216

Pay it forward.
$286

To book your session, send a message here

To say hello, and share your availability over the next two weeks (pick two or three evenings that work for you to choose from)

And I’ll reply with a time that works for both of us, and let me know the pricing option that’s right for you.

It will be great to connect!

Much love, and talk soon!

Jen

P.S.  For those of you who are wondering, YES, I do teach classes…

However, I strongly recommend finding a local teacher you resonate with, unless you absolutely feel that I am the right person to teach you, as having local support and building community is so powerful and will bring so much goodness to your life and to the area where you live. 

I do rarely teach and attune over a distance if you feel very strongly that you should learn from me, and classes are offered in person during retreats.  Feel free to reach out if this is something you feel is right for you.

More testimonials…

“This experience was so great. Jennifer was extremely welcoming which in turn made feel open to discuss my problem. She was so professional, understanding, and knowledgeable.

Post our initial session I woke up feeling so refreshed and elated! & the magic is still manifesting here, it’s only day one!. Haha. Thank you Jennifer. I recommend her if you want true results and great customer service. She certainly goes the extra mile! :)”
-KD White – Hampton, VA

“You rock!!!  Thank you so much I appreciate it!!!  I couldn’t remember my dreams for the life of me last night but I know I was having them because my husband said I was tossing and turning and laughing and talking throughout my sleep and I woke up feeling energized and in a wonderful mood so thank you for that. ❤
-Shanell Renee – Los Banos, CA

“I was introduced to #Reiki back in 2012 by my best friend and cousin extraordinaire, @_aquarian.goddess_and GIRL. In those seven years since, I have seen some s**t. 

The introduction to Reiki and level one #attunement created this whole new world (a whoole neww woooooorld) for me. It completely shifted my perception of reality which has totally changed my life.

When you’re learning Reiki, you’re not just learning how to heal someone… You’re learning how to heal yourself. You’re learning how to approach things gently. You’re learning why you, or others, hurt. You’re learning healthy ways to get past things. You’re learning patience. You’re learning how to understand. You’re connecting. You can feel energy moving and flowing and breaking free and just unleashing and I gotta tell you, there’s nothing like it. 

It can be a seriously intense experience sometimes. I even have an example of how crazy this can get. I was in a kind of low place in 2014, and @_aquarian.goddess_ did this #hardcorehealing Reiki session on me one night before work and when I woke up in the morning… oh god. I was vomiting like crazy. She cleared so much junk out of me that I was physically purging. Like. It was INTENSE. Very soon after that, I left the job that was making me really unhappy, never to return, and began down a never ending path of growth, learning and evolution. 

Reiki also offers this hardcore sense of comfort. Even when it gets rough like that, you can almost feel someone rubbing your back or holding your hair or something. I dunno. It’s weird. But it’s awesome. 

The energy work Jen (@_aquarian.goddess_) does digs REALLY f*****g deep in there and just really gets to the root of it all to gently encourage detangling and intense reconstructive repair. 

The way I feel after receiving energy work, or even after my Reiki attunements from her, its’s just lightning fingertips. I always feel like I’m Queen Goddess, King of the Universe. My confidence levels elevate, my spirituality is stronger and clearer than ever before, my decision making is improved, I see ‘the bigger picture’ more clearly, I feel refreshed and just GOD. A MASTER OF THE FRICKIN UNIVERSE. *ROARS*

#DM@_aquarian.goddess_ if you’re interested in her energy work because it really gets so much deeper than just my past experiences. She’s seriously pure magick.”

-Niki Munster, Painesville OH

Of Spirit & Earth – How to Tune in to Nature’s Cycles

We are infinite.  Sacred beings.  Born of stardust and molten rock.  Swirling tides and the passion between lips.  We move in spirals with the seasons and the skies, and we tend to forget the magick that pours through our essence.  It is time to remember.

I’d like to share this with you, as I’ve had a powerful impact from this song since I was about sixteen. It sinks me deeply into my universal awareness, observing participation with archetypes of my cyclical flowing pagan roots, and an experience of the beauty of what it means to bridge earth and spirit in the midst of the infinite.  

Gaia Consort - Aquarian Goddess
Listen to: Gaia Consort – Drawing Down the Moon

Ritual.  Bring it into your life.  In ways small and large.  In harmony with your essence, and touching the existence we were born of, whether by the cycles of the moon, or the sun, or the seasons, or simply reaching into the mystery of night with a candle and smiling into the infinite potential that you are here to activate for yourself.

Let your intentions for your life become a sacred moment.  Sit down.  Tell the Universe what you want to create.  Ask for guidance and insight.  And listen.

Tune this moment into the cycles of nature in whatever way feels natural.  I write my intentions at either the full or new moon, based on how I’m guided, send energy into them over the month, and then release them with pure trust to the Universe by fire, outside, under the light, or the shadow, knowing that they will be born in accordance with the flow that is needed in my life, and all of life around me.

And at times, I simply draw down the energy of the full moon, grounding it into the earth with the intention of illumination and harmony.  For All of Life.  Rippling out from the place where I stand, like a silver liquid pool, ever-expanding.

Whatever you choose to do, let it be your own.  In alignment with your inner truth and knowing.  And know that as you go, I am always walking beside you, a sister honored to be a part of your journey, and share in our sacred wisdom, Goddess to Goddess.

Bright blessings,

Jennifer Rae

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North & South Nodes – The Power of You – Live Video 30 Day Challenge

The Power of You.

The strongest force in the Universe lives inside of you.

Stand strong and let it come out today.

If you didn’t catch the live-stream on Instagram announcing the Power of You live video series, to help you break free into your best life possible, from the inside out, you can still find it here in my blog.

I committed to this 30 Day Challenge doing one live video on Instagram daily, to help bring myself out of my comfort zone and into greater communication with you! 

I have so much to share with you about the tools and practices and perspectives that help to bring out the power that rests deep within each of us, so that you can live and thrive in accordance with the core of who you are, embodied to the fullest.

In this first short episode, I share the story of how the idea for this series was sparked by a magnificent coaching call with Klara Hodulakova where we dug down deep to the bottom of what had been holding me back from expressing myself fully and really letting myself shine true in my business in the way that I desperately wanted to show up.

 

 

One of the things that I realized was that my perfectionist tendencies were stopping me in my tracks left and right (sound familiar?) and every time I’d think about putting myself out there in a new way, I’d come up with twelve reasons why I didn’t know just the right strategy (only to answer her questions about how much I love to share messages through video, and love YouTube and Instagram as platforms), didn’t have the perfect lighting and equipment (when mine is perfectly suited for live video and can improve over time), and was concerned I’d run out of ideas for the the steady stream of information I’d need to share to be consistent enough (when I could literally ramble about mystical and grounded self-improvement all day every day to whoever’s listening, because let’s face it, that’s the only thing my brain is focusing on besides being in greater harmony with nature, and the occasional Disney song.)

After this realization, that my perfectionism was holding me back in such a massive way from expressing myself to the fullest to the world, when I already know that doing just that is my whole purpose and message and goal, I realized the relevance it had to my astrology, particularly my north and south nodes.

In our natal charts, our north and south nodes tell us the direction we’re meant to move toward, in our approach to life, and the opposite of it that we are starting from.  For example, my north node is in Pisces, which means that in this life, I am meant to move more towards my spiritual, trusting, intuitive nature, and to let go of my tendency to get caught up in too much of the life approach of my south node, which is in Virgo, and shows up as a tendency to deeply analyze, strategize, and have every single detail in perfect order.  To be coming away from my south node means that I’ve had an overabundance of attention to detail, and need to lighten up about the details not always being smudge-proof and lined up in nice little rows.  To trust that who I am and what I offer is good enough because of what it is, and that its appearance is not here for me to be judging.  That it is a gift from the divine, no matter what it is shaped like, and that it should be treated as such and be free to flow in its raw and natural glory.

Sometimes we need to be reminded by a mirror of how we’re not walking our talk in an area we were trying to hide from ourselves. 

No matter how many years of self-improvement we’ve had, we will always be growing and challenging ourselves in new ways, and we will always have revelations about things we didn’t realize we were doing, because we disguised it as not being ready, by limiting beliefs.  And so here I am, full force, ready to share with you SO much from the core of my being, to help you break free in more and more ways, on this exhilarating 30 day journey into The Power of You.

Be sure to follow me @_aquarian.goddess_ so you can tune in on Instagram at 5pm EST today for the next Power of You live video! I’ll give you a hint as to the next topic.  It’s something we were masters of in our childhood, but never realized would be a practical and magical force that can transform our lives today.  Any guesses? 😊🌸🍃

My Secret

I have held inside of me 
 A secret,
 A swirling torrent,
 Held still in a singularity,
 Melded down into itself 
 A thousand times
 Over the course 
 Of countless patterns
 Of tingling neurons
 Leaping 
 With electric hesitation
 As my story,
 Moment by moment,
 Becomes incomplete.

I have clutched 
 The smile on my face
 So tightly
 That the bleeding heart 
 Behind it
 Began to seep through,
 Pounding against 
 The inside of my skull 
 And rattling the skeletons 
 In my closet
 So loudly
 That I 
 Almost expressed myself
 About an old dark moment
 That hasn't been released
 From the grip that holds
 Its snapping jaws 
 At arm's length,
 Away from my sight.

I am no ordinary human,
 And no more or less special 
 Than anyone you've seen
 In the faces you've avoided 
 On your street 
 On the way to the grocery.
 But I have keys and locks
 That most don't notice,
 Because, 
 Seeing all that's there
 Would bring most shoppers 
 To their knees,
 Wishing that somehow
 They could forget
 What makes us breathe,
 And take their chicken back 
 To the aisle 
 Where they still felt free.

I'm the kind of girl 
 You meet behind a counter,
 Or in an alien ship 
 Three dimensions away,
 Occasionally in the ghetto 
 With schizophrenics,
 Or by a pagan fire 
 Dancing in the rain.

Sometimes I'm in a trash house 
 In the desert,
 Or hiding under a blanket 
 On the couch.
 But my secret 
 Is always melded 
 Into everything,
 The details you don't hear,
 That I leave out.

I wrote this tonight to share with you my experience of opening.  We all have things that feel incredibly difficult to be open about, sometimes even with ourselves, but the more that we are brave enough to at least notice and feel what we’re hiding and why, the easier it will be to determine where our unexpressed story is holding us back.

What if you’re holding back the truth about what you need in a job or a relationship?  Or what if your unexpressed weird or wild or taboo side is keeping you from unleashing the most satisfying creative ways of expressing who you really are as an individual, and keeping you from getting to know yourself fully?

What if your old wounds, and other things you don’t like to think about, are keeping you in a habit of playing it safe, keeping yourself small, or settling for something that makes you wonder where you went wrong?

We have to be honest with ourselves and know our own secrets.  Only then can we begin to move forward, and be loving towards ourselves in the ways that we really need it, and be bold in the ways that we haven’t been for too long of a while.

And as always, I’m here with an open heart to remind you that you are perfect as you are, and always growing, and supporting you on your journey, Goddess to Goddess. 

All my love and appreciation,

Aquarian Goddess Jen

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